Jack Turner
If the route's boring in Japanese, at least you can fix it in English. Words to live by.
Fighter title
| My translation | Arcade translation | Home translation |
|---|---|---|
| The Revived Muscle Devil | The Indestructible Musclehead | The Muscle Devil from Dairyland |
Arcade sourced from The Arcade Flyer Archive, maunal sourced from Rage Quitter 87. Thank you!
Yeah, that's not bad. "Muscle Devil" is charmingly anime, though.
And thanks to Rage Quitter 87, I finally have confirmation of the home version, which is incredibly bizarre. First off that "muscle devil" isn't localized at all, second that it doubles down on Jack supposedly being from Wisconsin. Why Wisconsin? No idea. None at all.
Some minor points that in Japanese he's revived/resurrected, but in the arcade he's indestructible, which implies he never went down at all. The arcade also has a nice localization in "musclehead" that the home version doesn't, for whatever reason.
The entire thing is very odd, but I can't deny that they all seem related.
Interview
What do you treasure? My gang and my bike.
Who's your rival? Rival? If someone thinks they're my rival, they'd better show themselves!
What's been on your mind recently? There's been a lot of new gangs running around lately. It's time to bring the Neo Black Cats back to the streets!
Finally, give us a word about your participation in the current tournament. Looks like there's a lot of tough guys in this tournament. But my new moves will bring them all to their knees!
Intro vs Yuri
| My translation | Official translation |
|---|---|
| Better run if you don't want a beating, little girl! | Oh boy, dessert! I don't want to hurt you, so why not submit now! |
| Rude! I'll show you what happens when I get angry! | This story seems to get darker with each guy I meet. Grim city! |
The rather dull Japanese lines get considerably punched up here. As you may have guessed from my intro blurb, this will become a theme. And you know what? It's justified. It is absolutely justified.
...anyway. Jack's line goes from a pretty standard tough guy line to...well, calling Yuri "dessert". There's a bit of a nuance change between Jack telling Yuri to run if she doesn't want to get hurt vs telling her to give up because he doesn't want to hurt her, but there's a fairly clear connecting line, at least.
Meanwhile, Yuri's line gets turned from another standard line to a bizarre bit of fourth-wall breakage. "Grim city!" is a pretty 90s bit of phrasing, but at least it sounds like something a teen girl would pull out.
Intro vs Eiji
| My translation | Official translation |
|---|---|
| Hey kid! Don't want to get hurt? Pack up and head back to Japan! | Pack up your stuff and go home, muzzle face! |
| How considerate. But despite that, I think it's going to be me hurting you. | Thanks for the advice, smelly. But I'm stayin'! Coronary! |
What the fuck kind of slang is that?
I...just...
I want to be cool and professional about this, but man, sometimes 90s SNK translations throw even me for a loop.
So. Jack's line loses the threat, which robs it of a bit of context. Instead he's just telling Eiji to go home for whatever reason. We also see the grand return of "muzzle face", last seen in Robert's win quotes. Still, it's got the main idea of Jack telling Eiji to go home.
Meanwhile, Eiji's line...well, it does still have the main idea of Eiji thanking Jack and then brushing him off. And I wrote character voice off for this project from the beginning. But...where the hell is "coronary!" come from? Who talks like that? Has anyone ever talked like that? What does it even mean?
I have so many questions for the mysterious editor. So many.
Intro vs Jack
| My translation | Official translation |
|---|---|
| Huh? Since when do I have a twin brother? And an ugly one to boot! | Oh my god! My evil twin! Wait a minute! Am I that ugly? |
| You're just as ugly as me, dumbass! But strength - that's where I come out on top! | Who are you calling ugly, Jack? I got the looks, dude. |
1P Jack's line has all the elements of his Japanese line, though there's a bit of a difference between calling the 2P Jack ugly, and questioning his own looks. The twin is also not specified as "evil" in Japanese, but Americans gotta have their evil twins.
2P Jack's line loses some things. First there's confusion over who 1P Jack called ugly in a way that matches the Japanese line but not the English. I wonder if it was a mixup during multiple rounds of editing, I can see that happening. Then 2P Jack brags about his looks, not his strength. It makes sense with the first part of the line, so at least that's consistent. "Dude" feels a little off for Jack, but...like I said, I wrote character voice off years ago.
Intro vs Lee
| My translation | Official translation |
|---|---|
| So the Amazing Monkey-Man comes on stage. Want a banana? | The flying monkey man comes back. How 'bout some peanuts? |
| Kee! I will never forgive anyone who makes fun of monkeys. Prepare yourself! | Kee, kee! How about a talon up your strap, pal. Kee! Kee! |
So yeah, Jack's line is fine. He's making fun of Lee for imitating a monkey, and offers him some "feed". Since English doesn't really have a good word covering all animal feed like Japanese does, both the official translator and I switched it out for food associated with monkeys. I went with bananas, they went with peanuts, it's all a bit arbitrary. The English also throws in a Wizard of Oz reference, which is kind of cute.
Lee's English line is...hm. The Japanese line is standard, but it's kind of funny because it's about monkeys. The English line is less direct about why Lee is mad at Jack, but dang, that's some imagery. It ends up being much more memorable.
Intro vs Robert
| My translation | Official translation |
|---|---|
| Relax, punk. I won't beat you that hard...not enough to kill ya! | Oh, relax. I'm not gonna kill you. Well, maybe I won't. |
| You think you're going to beat me? Geez, you really are hopeless. | Who's nervous? I just had too many cups of the ol' joe today. |
Jack's line is pretty direct, if a bit dry. No major changes.
Meanwhile Robert's line just runs off and does its own thing in translation and honestly, I have no idea what the joke is here. Is Robert supposed to be covering his nervousness? Is he actually a coffee addict? Who makes jokes about coffee like that?
I should keep a count of how many exchanges can be described as "the first line is direct and the second line has nothing to do with the original".
Intro vs John
| My translation | Official translation |
|---|---|
| A guy who left the battlefield like you ain't no match for me! | Oh no, a former marine. I eat marines for breakfast! |
| Oh? Don't count your chickens. Now quit your bitching and bring it! | Well, then come and get it, lard butt! |
HE'S NOT A MARINE
It's such a silly thing to get mad about, but come on. How hard is it to remember John's a damn naval aviator? Like Top Gun! Just like Top Gun.
Anyway, despite that, Jack's line more or less makes sense as a translation of the Japanese. Okay, the "oh no" doesn't make a lot of sense, but I think it's supposed to be read as sarcastic. And it loses the nuance that because John left the military that means he's not a match for Jack. In fact, the English makes it sound like the "former" part of "former marine" doesn't matter.
John's line...is pretty straight. It loses the "don't count on it", but other than that it's fine. "Lard butt" even makes sense as an SNK insult here. Wow.
Intro vs King
| My translation | Official translation |
|---|---|
| I'm so glad to see you again, King. Now I'll smack you around even harder than last time! | King! You look more and more feminine with each year. |
| Hmph. I'm not the same King you beat up in the past, you know. | Feminine? Why you really know how to hit a nerve, you pig! |
Jack's English line is a dark foretelling of the future. Was the localizer a prophet?
Anyway it has nothing to do with the Japanese line, which is playing off their shared history.
King's line plays off the English, which means it has nothing to do with the Japanese. The Japanese is a fairly standard line, though it's interesting King uses King-sama to refer to herself here. I wasn't entirely sure how to get that across with the rest of the sentence, but it's a very arrogant way to refer to yourself and it's not something I've seen King do otherwise. Huh.
In English she's just mad about getting called feminine. Well, that's different.
Intro vs Takuma
| My translation | Official translation |
|---|---|
| A karate guy, huh. Can your stuffy style handle a real fight? | Karate artist... Sounds not much strong! |
| I'm going to drive the definition of true karate right into that empty head of yours! | You don't seem to know the true art of karate, or grammar. |
Kishi fixed this one for me.
Art of Fighting 2 doing Zany Video Game Quotes' job for them.
Remarkably, this one is not in ZVGQ's archive of AoF2 quotes. Weird, because they've got damn near every other exchange in the game.
You can tell where the localizer just gave up on Jack's route to start making it funny and damn the consequences. Honestly, I'm fine with it. There's the vague thread of connection to the Japanese in Jack looking down on karate and Takuma saying that Jack is too dumb to know about real karate, but on first glance this is a bewildering and hilarious exchange with hardly anything to do with what the characters originally said. It's a lot more memorable for it.
Intro vs Temjin
| My translation | Official translation |
|---|---|
| Guys like you aren't worth my time. Hurry up already! | Oh, you! Well, this should be a breeze. |
| If you lose yourself in your own power, you won't even win the matches you can win. | I like a man of confidence. Lightly broiled, that is! |
Kishi fixed things here too.
Jack's line is...confusingly worded, but I think it's intended to be straight. I think. Maybe.
"Oh, you!" is a hell of a thing to have a guy like Jack say.
Meanwhile, Japanese Temjin is handing out the sage wisdom and English Temjin is attending Hannibal Lecter's night cooking classes.
Intro vs Ryo
| My translation | Official translation |
|---|---|
| Now then...which bone should I break first? Arm? Leg? | Well then, which bone shall I rip off first? The arm? The leg? |
| Wow, scary. But that kind of overbearing self-confidence is really more my thing, you know. | That's which limb should I rip off first, idiot! Limb! |
Once again, AoF2 does ZVGQ's job for them. This one isn't in there either! Teel didn't want the competition. (I suspect no one cared about Jack enough to run though his route)
Besides the joke setup, Jack's line is translated very straight and direct. Ryo's English line just completes the joke. It makes sense, but I kind of like Japanese Ryo's self-awareness here.
Intro vs Mickey
| My translation | Official translation |
|---|---|
| You're seriously putting your wimpy boxing up against me? Hahaha! That's rich! | Oooh, Trickey Mickey the boxer boy. Eat my shoe boop boop bedoo. |
| Laugh while you can, big boy. I'll knock you out soon enough! | Read a lot of Yeats, huh. The poet of South-town. Pansy! |
...what?
What?
What?
Well, that sure is something, all right. I...look, it's really hard to analyse ones like these because it's pretty damn obvious that the localizer (correctly) decided that the Japanese lines were fucking boring and inserted...well, that. No, I don't know why they wrote any of that or what joke they were trying to make, but I can't deny that it makes me laugh every time and that's more than I can say for the Japanese.
Kishi did eventually point out to me that "boop boop bedoo" is probably a reference to Betty Boop though at no point does Betty demand anyone eat her shoes. That I know of, at least.
Intro vs Big
| My translation | Official translation |
|---|---|
| You really think that little broken stick is going to do shit against a tough guy like me? | What do you want to do with such a big stick? |
| Heh. I'll make you eat your fill of this little stick! | It's a weapon, Fatty, that only I can handle. |
Is that innuendo? It sounds like innuendo.
It's not very good innuendo, though, because Big's line doesn't really follow from Jack's. It would almost make more sense with a more literal translation of Big's line, something like "Make you eat it!", for example. I wonder if this suffered multiple editing passes that got it out of sync. Except it's not weird and crazy enough to feel like it had multiple passes. I dunno.
The English has something of the same idea as the Japanese...well, it's talking about Big's weapons. That's the same. The rest...yeah. In practice, the lines are pretty different and probably just got completely rewritten for reasons unknown. I mean, sure, boring, but the English is boring too. Maybe if it was better innuendo.
To the Police Commissioner
| My translation | Official translation |
|---|---|
| Suit: Mr. Jack Turner. The commissioner has requested to meet with you. Would you please come with us? | Suit: Mr Jack Turner? The police commisioner would like a word with you. Could you walk this way? |
| Jack: Sure, all right. But try to pull any funny business and...you know what'll happen, right!? | Well, okay. But it doesn't look easy. |
The goon's line was translated by Kishi.
...that joke still doesn't work in text, SNK! Stop it!
It took me a bit to get that was the joke, because it just comes off as a non-sequitur until you think about it. But I'm pretty sure. It's obviously a complete rewrite of the Japanese line, which is a threat that's a lot like Yuri's. Stranger danger, Jack!
Intro vs Geese
| My translation | Official translation |
|---|---|
| Geese: Welcome, Jack Turner. A pleasure to meet you. | Geese: What's up, Jack? Cat got your tongue? |
| Jack: Who the fuck're you?! What's going on?! Cough it up! | Jack: Mmm mmm! Heh, heh. Just kidding. Who're you? |
| Geese: Now now, calm down. I am Geese...Geese Howard. I have a good job waiting for you... | Geese: They call me Geese... Geese Howard. I'm here to offer you a job. |
| Jack: Shaddup! I'm just gonna kick your ass and head home! | Jack: A job? Oooh boy? But first I'd like your skull! |
SNK really struggled for a reason to have Jack fight Geese instead of joining him.
Anyway. The English starts off with a weird joke that's not there in Japanese and doesn't make a lot of sense. But that's a lot of Jack's route. It also means Geese doesn't tell Jack to calm down in English, making the line a lot more similar to other characters'.
English Jack is at least somewhat excited about working for a new mob boss. Weirdly feels more in-character than Japanese Jack. I do like "But first I'd like your skull!" as a line.
Win vs Geese
| My translation | Official translation |
|---|---|
| Jack: How's the mighty Jack's punch taste? | Jack: Eat my fist, goosehead! |
| Geese: Ggh, it seems I wasn't taking you seriously. | Geese: Heh, it's all over. |
| Jack: Gh...what in the world?! | Jack: Eh! What the heck...? |
| Suit: This way, Mr. Geese. | Suit: This way, Mr Geese. |
| Geese: Though I lost this time, have no doubt that I'll be back to even the score. Until then, farewell. | Geese: I have lost this time. But I will be back. For now, my farewell. |
| Jack: You think you can get away, asshole?! Arggh! | Jack: You,scum! Are you letting him go? |
The bits that are the same as Ryo's route were translated by Kishi!
Something I noticed: Jack's second line matches John, Mickey, and Eiji's, in English and Japanese. Meanwhile, his last line matches Mickey and Big's, both in English and Japanese.
What I'm saying is that after awhile, SNK kind of stopped giving a shit. At least they picked the right characters to do it to. I didn't pick up on it for a long time because it's all the boring characters. Since the lines are the same in both languages, I wonder if they're all pointing to the same line in memory instead of being duplicated across characters. I've seen evidence of lines not being duplicated before, but maybe...?
I need a Neo Geo hacker.
The first line is very standard in Japanese, and honestly I like the English rendition. It fits, "eat my fist" sounds all right in English, and "goosehead" is a bit goofy for Jack, but I'm always here for mocking Geese's name. Good job all around.
The last line suffers a bit from lack of context while translating. You can drop subject and object and the listener just has to have the context to know what you're talking about in Japanese, which makes translating without context really hard. In this case, the word used, にがす, means "to miss (e.g. a chance); to lose; to let get away; to fail to catch". The official translator assumed this meant Jack was yelling about someone letting Geese get away, but given the context I think Jack is talking to Geese, which means he's asking if Geese thinks he'll let Geese escape.
Of course, you could also make an argument that Jack is talking to Geese's goons, but I think that makes less sense. And にがすか is used by characters like how I translated it all the fricking time in anime/video games, so I'm reasonably confident in my interpretation.
Geese Goes to Japan
Since Geese's migration is common to all characters, I put it under Misc.
Ending
| My translation | Official translation |
|---|---|
| Jack: Listen up, you punks! From now on you're all members of my gang, the Neo Black Cats! I'm the leader, and you will follow my orders without question! Got it? | Jack: Do you hear me, friends. No more shall we cower in the shadows. We shall begin a new gang, the Neo Black Cats. I made it up. I'll be the leader! You will all follow my bidding! |
| Goons: Yeah! | Goons: Whooa, Jaack. Jaack |
| With that, the Neo Black Cats returned in strength. What fate awaits Jack and his gang? | Little did Jack's followers realize the Neo Black Cats were to become a creative dance group. |
Jack's speech loses the idea that he's forcibly dragging people into his gang, but is otherwise pretty close. It is a bit more inspirational than the Japanese.
The goons' line sounds silly written out with periods like that, but it's a nice attempt.
And well, the narration is a joke. As everyone already guessed.
Win Quotes
| My translation | Official translation |
|---|---|
| vs self | |
| There's only room for one shadow leader. Fakes can piss off! | Will the phoney Jack please lie face down on the pavement. |
| vs others | |
| No matter how many times you challenge me, you'll never defeat the mighty Jack! | Cake walk, dude. Go back to your mother's apron strings. |
| Thought you had some backbone, but guess not. Too bad. | I thought you had guts, kid. But you only have a lousy wardrobe. |
"Will the real ___ please stand up?" comes from game show To Tell The Truth, which apparently ran from the 50s to the 10s. Dang. That's long enough for the phrase to become embedded in American pop cultural consciousness, so it's probably not a direct reference, but it is one that shows a good knowledge of pop culture.
So it's a complete rewrite, but it's funnier and more memorable than the Japanese. Since when was Jack a shadow leader anyway? That's Big.
The first generic line is also a complete rewrite for an incredibly boring Japanese line. "Dude" is still a weirdly surfer thing for Jack to say, but I'll allow it.
Not sure what's up with the clothes joke in the second generic line. It's kind of a non-sequitur. The rest is a pretty straight translation.